‘Let’s Talk About It’ banners prompt domestic abuse discussion

A quick look at the windows of many businesses in Dover-Foxcroft, as well as down Route 7 in Dexter and Newport, shows a 4- by 2-foot banner featuring a woman’s portrait filling most of the space, a short quote of theirs and the words “Let’s Talk About It.” Below the image is the 24-hour helpline for Partners for Peace and the web listing for www.findingourvoices.net.

Thirty window banners have already been placed around the region, with another 20 still to be posted, for the Finding Our Voices Let’s Talk About It banner project. Finding Our Voices is a Camden-based non-profit devoted to boldly and creatively breaking the silence of intimate partner abuse, and the Let’s Talk About It initiative is being carried out in different regions of the state.

Finding Our Voices Founder/President Patrisha McLean said each banner — featuring one of 27 images of different survivors of domestic abuse — has the specific region’s domestic abuse helpline listed,  1-800-863-9909 for Partners for Peace in Piscataquis and Penobscot counties.

Photo courtesy of Finding Our Voices
LET’S TALK ABOUT IT — A Finding Our Voices Let’s Talk About It window banner is displayed on East Main Street in Dover-Foxcroft. The aim of the project is to raise awareness of domestic abuse and provide resources for those in need.

“What I did is got in my car and the banners all had the Partners for Peace logo,” McLean said about her drive to the north on Friday, Aug. 21. “I also got Quirk Auto to sponsor these ones so I got the Quirk Auto logo along with Camden National Bank which is the statewide banner sponsor.”

McLean said the visit to Dover-Foxcroft was her first and, after stopping at various businesses along the way from Dixmont to Dexter, she began at Dover True Value. McLean said owner Tim Robinson quickly agreed to have a banner posted in a front window facing East Main Street.

She asked about where other shopping areas are and McLean was directed to East Main and Summer streets where more banners have been placed or will be posted in the near future. Among the in-town businesses participating in Let’s Talk About It are Center Theatre, Dave’s World, Foxcroft Printers, NAPA, Pat’s Pizza, Shear Visions, Spruce Mill Farm and Violet’s Everything Shop.

“I was trying to go to places that a lot of people go to so a lot of people will see the signs,” McLean said. “I also try to go to hair salons because they are a safe space, sanctuary places for women.” She said she had a number of conversations about the project during her day in Dover-Foxcroft.

“They will be up through at least October, that’s what the businesses said they would do,” McLean said. “I am hoping they will stay up longer because after that the winter is coming and it will be an even more dangerous time for the women and children trapped with their angry and controlling family members. Ideally if these could stay up through the winter that would be wonderful.”

McLean said she is grateful to the business owners for letting her use a large portion of their windows.

An author and photographer, McLean designed the banners which went through several layouts. She said at first there was much more information than what the public sees now.

“I realized that the simpler the better, so this is maybe the fourth iteration because we started in April,” McLean said.  “This is the new, improved version where it is really simple. You have the woman, you have the quote, you have the hotline number and then our group. Just to keep it simple so people go by and they get a quick message.”

“It’s important to have the photo of the woman as large as possible too,” she said. With the exception of her own, McLean took all the portraits and “I worked with the women to come up with the right quote.”

She said the 4- by 2-foot size was intentional. “I know they had to be big because this whole project developed when the pandemic took hold in April and we had a lot of events planned for inside gatherings and they were all being canceled. I knew that there is more of a need for this outreach than ever and I knew we couldn’t gather outside so let’s bring it outside. But a lot of people were just going from their homes to the grocery store or the drugstore and that’s why they did need to be big, because if a woman was just driving in her car I wanted her to be able to see it”

“This all started as a photo/audio exhibit at the Camden Public Library, Valentine’s Day 2019,” McLean said. “It was just going to be an exhibit at the Camden Public Library and it was mostly local women that I know. They came up to me after my situation became so public.” 

Finding Our Voices was launched by McLean three years after her husband of 29 years, singer/songwriter Don McLean, was arrested and subsequently convicted of domestic abuse.

“A lot of these women I had known for a long time but they didn’t know about me, I didn’t know about them,” McLean said. “It was all very quiet and then my situation became very public and that’s when a lot of the women very close to me, friends of many, many years and neighbors let me know that they had also been through it and stepped up to join me with this.”

McLean said she asked the Maine Coalition to End Domestic Violence to put a post about Let’s Talk About It on the organization Facebook page and this connected her with women from beyond just the Midcoast. “We have people on the banners from Scarborough, Casco, Machias, they are from all over the state,” she said.

“It’s sort of letting people know this happens to everybody, all ages, all socioeconomic demographics,” McLean said. “A lot of times the stereotypical image of a battered woman is a woman with a black eye and looking pitiful, we are strong women. Also it doesn’t necessarily involve physical abuse, emotional abuse is very horrible.”

McLean said domestic abuse is complicated and should be discussed — hence the project name. She said she wants those going through it to know they are not alone, there is a way out and help is available at the other end of the number on the banner.

“I just feel that providing our voices is about breaking the silence because as long as no one talks about it you stay in it longer,” she said.  

“All the women in the banners have been in it and they got out and you can get out too, that’s the main message in the pandemic for the women who are trapped and think they can’t get out,” McLean said. ‘Yes you can, just be careful because it’s dangerous and you have to get in touch with your domestic abuse agency — they can help you stay safe.”

Partners for Peace Rural Advocate Cindy Freeman Cyr said early in the year she and McLean were planning a presentation in Millinocket, part of McLean’s desire to reach out to rural communities. The program in northern Penobscot County did not happen due to the pandemic but McLean contacted Freeman Cyr about placing Let’s Talk About It banners in the agency’s coverage area.

“Patrisha’s found just an amazing response from businesses,” Freeman Cyr said. “When people see them I think people are aware of how powerful the images are and most everyone has been willing to post them.”

She said any business or organization interested in having a banner to display can contact her at 207-564-8166 or cfreemancyr@partnersforpeaceme.org.

“For years we have been putting out stories, we put out our brochures, we put posters in bathrooms and everywhere we can think of, doctor’s offices, etc.,” Freeman Cyr said. “But it’s the images of the women whose stories are reflected that are so compelling because it isn’t just verbiage it’s a face of a person who looks like you or looks like someone you know or your mom, your sister, your friend and you’re drawn in by the photograph and the very simple ‘Let’s Talk about It.’” 

She said this message prompts thought about the portrait subject, their words and the other information provided. 

“It’s really powerful and compelling, it’s a photograph of faces of people who could be anyone that we all know,” Freeman Cyr said.